i can't forget the way, your kiss is.
but im not the girl you should be missing.
you gave me the courage to leave, to accept, to face the facts.
i cried like some fucking idiot that day, do you rmb?
its because i was hurt that thoroughly that i know we'll just stick to being friends.
now i'm thinking of taking back everything.
i just stare at the screen as i type each and every single word.
i don't know how to tell you all these.
but i choose to blog it up, hopefully you'd read it.
aye? :)
you were the one who made me gave up on you.
now it's my turn to make you give up.
our relationship was wonderful, those fond memories just tend to make me smile whenever i made flashbacks.
i can never let go those days we spent together, i thought we'd made it through.
you've became an important part of my life since 21 may.
till now i can tell you,
even if we're no longer together, even if we'll never ever be together.
you'll still be an important part of me, could be an important best friend :D
because i'd swear upon every words i say, now, here.
that my love i had for you was the deepest.
among every guy i met.
you've been the most special, most caring, most lovely and cute.
you've been almost perfect.
maybe fate was making fun of us, maybe time wasn't enough for us.
maybe our time was all used up already. maybe our memories was filled up already.
if only we'd made it through and i won't be stuck up here typing this.
allowing my tears to flow through my cheek.
you'd tell me how many other guys i met in the past, they seem to treat me better than you do.
you're wrong, so badly wrong.
i miss your hugs, your playfulness, your disturbing, your smell especially, your smile, your cuddles, your house, your friends you slack with, your family members, your bed, your way of playing with my lips, cuddling your cheeks against mine..
i miss you too. its true, from the very bottom of my heart.
remember the night i just ended work and went to find you?
i use betrayal against myself because you told me we couldn't be together.
i betrayed myself and told myself i don't love you and that i can accept that we're through.
i hurt that badly that i was hoping you'd hug me the very next second.
you just wave goodbye, told me to take care.
so i took your words, and hope you'll probably be happier than me.
you will be! i believe you would, okay boy?
promise me after what we went through; there'll be a better girl than me.
so that you two will go through everything i wanted to go through with you.
so that she could be there whenever you needed someone and i couldn't be there..
so that she will start and end your day with a smile like how i wished i could.
so that your family members will love her more than me.
so that you two could make it one day hand in hand with wedding gowns and tuxedos,
so that i'll be happy for you, always.
even if i became just a memory but nothing else.
good luck and all the best.
:)